“We always hear first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the baby carriage. That is not necessarily true anymore for millions of people. We’re skipping steps.” - Episode 20 (24:33 - 24:43)
The real topics mainstream media neglects to cover on fertility issues.
This was the topic for my latest episode of the FU Project podcast. You can listen here.
The ultrasound image on your friend’s social media feed hits you like a sucker punch as you sink into the couch from another unsuccessful round of IUI. It’s another “whoops I’m pregnant!” announcement, the third in the last five weeks (not that you’re counting).
Are you the only one physically struggling, financially hurting, emotionally worrying, and medically fighting to become a mother?
No! You’re not.
Mainstream media has failed to raise public awareness on what it really takes to become pregnant. In fact, they have neglected to openly discuss fertility issues at all! Andrea Syrtash is on a mission to break that taboo. The Relationship Expert and Creator of “Pregnantish” has created the first media website for those navigating through fertility issues and treatments. You, along with every single, couple and LGBTQ, are invited to join in the conversation!
“There were enough of us, my friends and family, who had gone through infertility. People needed a lifestyle site exclusively dedicated to this topic.” - Episode 20 (14:07 - 14:18)
After the removal of a massive fibroid tumor in 2012, Andrea had no idea it would be almost a decade before she became a mother. It wasn’t until 18 fertility treatments, 2 drop-out surrogates, and 1 volunteer surrogate (Andrea’s cousin) later that her healthy baby girl, Arielle, arrived. During that time, Andrea was struggling to find any online publications beyond medical advice that offered personal support for those dealing with fertility issues. It was out of this frustration for well-balanced material that the concept of “Pregnantish” was born.
Andrea wanted to read real stories from real people with real fertility issues. Now, you can!
Here are some of the helpful topics Andrea has elevated into conversations.
The Non-Linear Path of Fertility. The stories you read about celebrities who get pregnant after one round of IVF are what we call extremely lucky cases. Most women experience many twists and turn on their journey towards motherhood. Expect the unexpected. Some moments will be magical, others heartbreaking, but all eye-opening. Buckle up! Stay open to all the options available to you.
New Perspectives. Fertility issues can define and punctuate your life. However, it is possible for you to resist being completely consumed and maintain your sanity. Ask yourself what is working well in the midst of this terrible situation? Try to take inventory of all the good in the midst of your pain. Andrea found the mantra, “I’m sad and I’ll be okay,” to be extremely helpful as she worked to find new perspectives in her own journey.
Messy Break-Downs. Admit it. Fertility issues suck! They break hearts, challenge relationships, and push couples to their physical, emotional, and financial limits. You don’t have to wear a brave face all the time. In fact, it’s totally okay for you to have a good old-fashioned break-down. That’s right. You can cry it all out because this journey is hard.
The Gift from All of This. We know it’s hard to believe right now. But your perfect baby will come. When they do, you will never take for granted being a parent. That doesn’t mean you’re not allowed to pull your hair out and complain every now and then! It just means the significance of the gift of parenthood is cherished even more so because of your incredibly hard journey.
“You don’t need to know the where, the how, the who, or the when. You just need to know the what, which is “I WILL be a parent.”
- Episode 20 (45:45 - 45:56)
Life is not a straight line. Nor should you expect your fertility journey to be. There are so many small details and nuances that go into becoming pregnant. However, there is only one thing you should really know at this point.
Do you want to be a mother?
Then you will.
Trust that everything else will fall into place. When you feel discouraged, uncertain, or confused connect with the community of others on “Pregnantish” for support. You don’t have to quietly deal with all of this alone. We are all here for you.
With thanks & love,
How to get involved
If you would like more information about The FU Project and my mission to get you pregnant so much faster and smarter than I did, please check out my website.
If you liked this episode, be sure to subscribe and leave a quick review on iTunes. It would mean the world to hear your feedback and we’d love for you to help us spread the word. There are so many women suffering in silence that could use this help and support.